Forgive me for this topic of discussion or expression. This subject matter is about the loss of someone’s life. If you are in a good mood, a great mood, a positive mood, a happy mood today for any great reason I want to sincerely congratulate you for that reason and I care enough to say that it would behoove you not to read any further if you are not interested in reading material that speaks of a negative outcome. I do not want to ruin your mood. I do not wish to rain in your parade.
I created the blog Inspired Thought Inspired Action with the intention to share all the great and positive quotes, phrases, messages that inspires my thoughts and in turn inspires my actions which may in turn inspire you to do the same.
This blog is meant to be a positive environment for my fellow bloggers to visit….(can you feel the “but” coming…)
BUT life is not a “box of chocolates”. Life is of the good and bad. And the good and bad must be discussed to reinforce the beneficial reasons why we should aim to live a life full of good ways and educate ourselves and our loved ones on the negative outcomes if one chooses to do the opposite.
This is the reason why I am about to discuss the topic I watched on the The Dr. Phil Show.
We must learn from the bad in order to maintain reasons why we should always live for good.
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Here is a summary of the Dr. Phil Episode I watched this morning
Las Vegas showgirl Deborah Flores-Narvaez was allegedly strangled by her boyfriend, Cirque Du Soleil dancer, Jason Griffith. Authorities claim that after she was killed, Jason and his roommate put Deborah’s body in a tub and poured cement over it. Deborah and Jason had a history of domestic violence claims in their relationship, and now Jason sits in jail charged with her murder. His mother, Charlene, and sister, Samantha, say Jason wouldn’t hurt anyone, and if he did kill Deborah, it must have been in self-defense. Charlene says she believes Deborah was the violent one, and that her son’s video recording of Deborah proves it. Deborah’s mother, Elsie, and sister, Celeste, who believe Jason killed Deborah, meet Jason’s family for the first time on Dr. Phil’s stage. And, Jane Velez-Mitchell, host of her self-titled show on HLN, weighs in on the investigation.
Please take the time to watch clips of the episode to understand my response.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZJj8kp4WJeA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vnr5Z66DsQ4
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After watching this episode, I was completely in shock spiritually and mentally.
I am completely amazed by how the mother and sister continues to defer from the fact that this man should still be addressed as guilty for either leading the decision or taking part in the decision to cement and dismember his girlfriend with his friend…..no matter if this situation started as self defense.
Wow…:Shaking my head:… Self defense can NOT be used as an excuse to take such extreme actions.
My heart hurts for this lost life!
No matter how much there is talk about her being an agressor. No matter how many times you show videos of her provoking him, of her swearing at him or other people!
No one…NO ONE deserves to lose their life in such a cruel and untimely way!
Is the mother and sister’s love for him blinding them from common sense?
Any man and any woman can provoke their boyfriend or girlfriend into a rage. And that boyfriend and girlfriend has a choice…
To yell back or not to yell back…..
To stay put and argue or not to stay put and not to argue….
To walk away or not to walk away….
To put their hands on that person or not put their hands on that person….
To strangle or not to strangle…
He made a choice and a witness confessed that he put his hands on her. And a clear point was made that its takes effort to strangle a person to death. During that time of effort… he could of stopped himself if he allowed common sense to kick in and instead choose to pay a smaller price for his actions rather than the risk of facing life in prison.
I keep hearing self defense..I haven’t heard anything about a knife or a gun at the scene of the crime. What was his reason for self defense if he was not threatened with a gun or knife/weapon?
Dr. Phil made a clear point that Jason was at least 50lbs heavier than her….how can her smacks and hits compare to Jason’s???
A TRUE man will never hit a woman….because he knows that its the **right thing to do.**
He will respect the fact that most men are biological stronger than women and it is not right to take advantage of that……It’s not right to abuse that fact.
But of course it’s not right for anyone to put their hands on anyone! Young, fit or old…. Girl, boy, man or woman…. No one has a right to put their hands on anyone! (parents spanking is another topic of discussion…)
And even if she was doing wrong by hitting him, it is still not right to retaliate by hitting her back.
My heart hurts for Deborah’s sister and mother. I am imagining being in their shoes. I am imagining how frustrating and hurtful it is that the mother and daughter of my sister’s murderer are not responding with a pure sense of empathy for the fact that he took part in cementing and dismembering the body of a human being.
How can someone NOT deserve life in prison for that??!!! Self defense or not!
How can someone NOT deserve life in prison for taking part or leading the decision to cement and dismember the body of human being???!!!
No excuse is ever good enough to act in such a way!
I am completely dumbfounded and saddened. I can never be that mother….. I can never be that sister. No matter how great of a man he was yesterday, last month, last year. A person can change in an instant.. A person can change into someone amazingly better or amazingly digress to someone unpredictable and unrecognizable.
And one must not respond in denial and defend a person’s wrongful ways.
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Prevention…
We need to learn from this unfortunate story and practice prevention.
How can stories like this be prevented?
What does it take to prevent a man and woman from ending up in such a toxic relationship?
What will it take to prevent our son and our daughter from growing up into such a toxic relationship and into such a negative outcome?
What will it take to prevent this history from repeating itself?
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Wow….I have so many thoughts in my head about this, but yet I am somewhat speechless! I need to digest it and look at the links you posted and come back to this and post something….
Thank you for your time lovebugsworld. The mother and daughter of this man has completely disturbed me. There are so many stories of relationships that have ended with such a bad outcome when it could of been **prevented** if they never met or if they never made the choice to see each other again.
I am disturbed to the point where I want to know how can this be stopped, not just reduced but stopped! Can we live in a world where we can teach our men and women, our daughter and sons, our sisters and brothers, our nieces and nephews, our godsons and goddaughters how to make the right choices and how to identify and avoid the wrong choices??? It seems like an impossible task but worth fighting for.
I look forward to your thoughts.
Whew…..it took me some hours to sit on this. I thought about it while I was sleeping and I must say that I am disturbed, too. In anything, you hate to pass judgement because we are taught that is just a no-no. However, the entire act was calculated. Even if he was defending himself(I don’t condone any violence and definitely a man hitting a woman), why was there a need to even take it that far? He could have easily walked away or better yet, called the police. But, to clearly go to the lengths that he did, is just absurd!! And he had help from his roommate!!! I am sorry…it’s clear, cut what happened with this situation. I was also disturbed with his mom and sister. I get it, no one wants to believe that their love one could be capable of doing anything wrong and to that extreme, but to say, “well, i know my son” just doesn’t hold weight because no one knows exactly what someone is capable of doing in a fit of rage. Family, friend, or the next. I agree with you, it has to stop. We as women, need to get out of these violent and tumultuous relationships and as men, if it is to the point of them having to result to violence, they need to walk away, too!! It is just to many stories time and time again about these violent deaths that could easily be avoided if we just walked away.
Exactly!…..why was there a need to take it that far indeed! ….the right choice was always available to him and his roommate, to simply confess and call the police instead of take their crime another step farther into senselessness!
I wish there was life classes that students can take during the summer or in college. Life classes like what Oprah does. To put everyone in the same community on the same page that a loving relationship does not involve or require heated arguments which will make it acceptable for a girlfriend or boyfriend to return to someone who recently slashed their tires and destroyed part of their property!
When that happens, its a sign not to ever get involved again and make sure the police is always alerted when that person refuses to call it off with you! So that way you won’t be in a position to kill or be killed. Oi!
You know….a Life class would be great!! You should pitch that idea to Oprah some way, some how or start at a school(s). It would actually save some lives!!
Yes indeed, We are very much like minded!
I have had a vision of having my own class when it comes to teaching Oprah’s life class lessons of prevention and self development to my lil sister and cousin’s in both sides of my family. Whenever they face a minor or major challenge, I have found the opportunity to teach them what I’ve learned.
I wouldn’t want them to wait till they reach the age of 27 to finally get aha moments when they could start getting it at 10 years younger than me!
I so needed Lifeclass in my life 10 years ago! But no complaints, I PRAISE God because he gave me the ability to pay attention to Oprah’s Lifeclass in HIS TIME especially after all the turmoil I faced, my eyes were wide open to solutions and Life Class came just in…and HIS time is never too late and never too early! His Time was JUST RIGHT for me and I am so grateful <3 <3 <3